Hey dear followers,
I know I haven’t been very active around here but believe, it is for a good reason. School and job hunting are 2 quite intensive tasks. Anyways!
Today I want talk about a subject that I have never mentioned here but after so many comments and questions in past months, I thought maybe my words and experience could help someone else.
At 27 one of the questions I get VERY often (too often, I would say): ‘So why don’t you have a boyfriend?’ or ‘When are you going to settle down with someone?’
The short answer is: ‘I haven’t found someone that would fit me’
The long answer is:
About 3 years ago from now I meet someone that I thought he was the one! (Who hasn’t thought this?) I fell deeply in love for that person as I have never. The problem was that person didn’t appreciate me the same way (or at least, not with the same level of intensity). And when this happens, usually the outcome is not very bright. It was no different for me. 😀
It took over 1 year to get over him and I promise to you for 6 f** months of that 2016 I cried every single day for him, I journal about him every single day and I missed him every single day for 6 months.
On my 7th month, I wrote him a letter with all the feelings I had inside me but I never heard back from him. That attitude may a shift on me and on that same week, I deleted all his contacts and didn’t check again his social media, photos as I would do. And, eventually, little by little, day by day, month by month, he disappeared from my head.
After this love episode I didn’t close myself to guys but my perspective of loving someone changed drastically. WHY? Because in the seek of loving someone, I almost forgot to love myself and respect myself.
If there is something I learned during this all journey is, no matter where you live, the culture you belong to, human beings are quite similar and you can quickly see what a man is up to for you. In the past 3 years I have built 3 amazing signs how to see if someone really deserves you. Let me share them with you:
1. Texting – ‘I am terrible at texting’
Guys are bad at texting anyways but there are some of them that actually make an effort when they like you. So when they tell me: ‘I am bad at texting’; I am like: ‘find a better excuse, pleaseeeeee’ . Someone will always find a subject to discuss if he/she likes/appreciates you.
2. Time – ‘I am very busy with work’ – CLASSIC
SURE, you are. Everyone is busy. I can always say that I have to work or study but when you REALLY appreciate the other person, you make the time. The person becomes a priority. So please, don’t accept ‘no time’ as an excuse.
3. Gestures – ‘I can’t because of money’
Listen my friend, when a guy likes he flies to the other side of the world to see you, even when he is tight with money (believe me, cause miss Danielita has seen that happened). With this being said, I am not saying a guy has to buy you a vacation somewhere but when someone likes you, you will find a way to impress you. If he does not have money, then he will just have to be more creative than others.
So am I still single?
I guess because I have learned a bit from the past; I have also become more demanding; and I have understood my value.
To all my single friends (who are not many anymore, haha), eventually the one will show up, as long as he does not do any of the 3 funny funny things I described above.
Miss you all dear garotas and world travelers
Beijinho,
Daniela