Dear Self,
Take a deep breath. Life has become so busy that very often you forget to do the little tiny things that help you to remain in shape, mentally and physically.
I see you. 😀 Always smiling, always spreading big hugs and strong words but I know inside you, you are still the same little girl so afraid to not be loved by others. I know deeply inside you, you are still seeking for others’ approval in everything you do. WHY? Because you have not yet learned how to love yourself just the way you are. You tell others to love themselves but you don’t do it. It is OK, don’t cry… Many in this world are just like you.
I found it funny when girls ask you how to be confident like you, just because you are able to use strong red lipstick and they are not. Little they know that you actually use the strong red, pink and whatever other color because you can’t see yourself in the mirror without it – you still struggle to look in the mirror and see your beauty.
You know, I am proud of you. You have accomplished so many things already in life but when I watch you, I still don’t see an happy girl. I see you nervous, I see you anxious… What’s wrong?! No matter you have, do or achieve in life, nothing seems to be enough for you to recognize your value. First, you were not good enough because you didn’t have a stable job in France, later you found one. After you were not good enough because you had not traveled like others, so you went backing for almost 2 years. Then you start questioning yourself and your abilities because you didn’t find a job in Australia in the first month, in the second month of your arrival, you started a job in one university in Sydney… But that didn’t seem enough because in the past, universities in the USA have not liked your profile. So you went all over again and apply to study in the US and finally you got accepted to do a master in one of the top 10 schools in the world. But today, I still don’t see 100% happy, 100% fulfilled, 100% proud of you. What’s wrong?
I know life can be tough without family and friends around and I also know your biggest fear is to look back and see none has your back. But it is OK, remember: we do not need much and many to be happy. Did I tell you today you are beautiful and I love you? Did you tell yourself this?
Beijinho,
Daniela